Uritu Yupanqui

Nature: Mummified mage
First Encountered: 3.7 "It was in the Bleak December", where he was encountered as the eternal custodian at the Temple of Sebek

Description: A series of crystals focuses sunlight from the sky above into the depths of the temple. Far below ground, this light is channeled into the head of an ancient mummy. The mummy is sealed from the neck down in a pyramid of black stone, but the beam of light reveals every movement of its hollow eyes and desiccated lips. The dead air echoes with the mummy’s words: the slogans and taglines of 1,000 products in a dozen different languages.

Uritu’s head is the capstone of the seven-foot high black pyramid where the rest of his body is sealed. His face is loosely wrapped in painted leather bands whose colors have nearly faded. His skin (where it can be seen) is shriveled and brown. A brilliant beam of yellow light descends from a crystal in the ceiling above him, illuminating the entire pyramid but focused on a pearl embedded in leather atop his skull.

Although Uritu’s mind is saturated with the flotsam of modernity, his manner is that of an ancient king. He uses slang and pop culture references without truly understanding his words or the world they come from.

Info: Who he was originally, none can say; inscriptions on his tomb suggest he was a sage, priest or other keeper of lore. When he was buried, his tomb was enchanted so that he could bathe in sunlight forever — although he might never leave his resting place, he would not be denied the joys of the day.

Perhaps this was the way things were for thousands of years. But 20th-century science brought radio and television into the electromagnetic spectrum, and they, too, were channeled into the head of Uritu Yupanqui. The sage’s magic allowed him to translate static into language, and new media pummeled his brain day and night. In the 21st century, media programming is nearly all that remains of Uritu Yupanqui’s mind; the secrets of Atlantis have been driven out and replaced by news, entertainment and advertising.

The result is that the ancient symbols and flags which once identified enemy nations and religions have been replaced with brand names and logoes. As the eternal and undying protector of the temple he inflicts his curse upon adventuring explorers who bear the symbols of his foes. Name-brand clothing, bottled water, national flags and similar markings all identify his enemies, now that his mind has been overwritten with media transmissions for all these years.


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